On my system the first partition is taken up by FreeBSD (80G) and Windows XP takes up the second -- Never had any problems.
Personally, I don't care much for grub, I used it for a short time some time ago when experimenting with CentOS, and I could boot Windows with it ... So it would guess it's a configuration on your end (?)
As OldCoot already mentioned, GAG is an excellent graphical boot loader, or you can use the FreeBSD bootloader if you want a simple bootloader that `just works'™.
Also post your boot.ini on your %SYSTEMDRIVE%.
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UNIX was not designed to stop you from doing stupid things, because that would also stop you from doing clever things.
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