well, just to conclude the thread:
I replaced sendmail with postfix and everything works out of the box. something is going on with sendmail around freebsd version 10.1-rel from what i've read in the freebsd mailinglist.
postfix looks to have a well documented website with some real world scenarios. sendmail just seems overall cryptic to me.
no solution, but maybe this can save someone else a day of tinkering
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